5 Ways for Stressed Moms to Decompress

My kids were demanding my attention with school.  My son was having an attitude because he didn’t understand an assignment.  My daughter was asking if I could help her with a project.  My baby was fussy because she decided to skip her morning nap….. Well, you can probably imagine where this is going.

I blew a gasket.  I just couldn’t handle all the demands.  I yelled at my son and daughter.  Yeah, Mother of the Year Award goes to me.

I felt like a jerk.  The cycle of shame and disappointment ensued.  “I’m such a terrible mom.  I suck.”  Maybe your self-talk is a little different than mine, but that’s usually how mine goes.

In an act of desperation and feeling fed up with my reaction to stress, I went to Google searching for answers.  Yeah, because that’s what I do….I go to Google.  Don’t judge. 🙂

So I run across an article that tells you to take a test.  The first question asks, “Is your home a place where you and your kids can de-stress? Are there laughs and time to enjoy each other’s company in a relaxed mode?”…..Uhhhh, NOPE!  Not in my house.  At least today it doesn’t feel like that.

The next question asks, “If you asked your kids to describe you, would they say you are usually calm, take time to listen and are enjoyable to be around? Or running around, tense and stressed out?”  I actually laughed out loud when I read this because my kids are no respecter of persons.  They will straight up tell you that I’m always yelling at them and I’m tense.  Like I said, Mother of the Year Award.

After reading this article, I walked away learning one thing about myself.  I am one stressed person!

Let’s get serious here for a moment.  As much as we can make fun of our stressful situations, stress is never a good thing.  It’s not good for your physical or mental health.  It only causes more problems.  I’m not going to take too much time explaining what stress does to your body, but you can go here to read more about it.

It’s easy to feel the despair and hopelessness of ever getting a handle on stress.  But, can I tell you that it only gets better as much as you’re willing to find a solution.  That’s truth talk.  You have to intentionally decide to work at it.  The same goes for marriage and parenting.  It takes work and conscious effort to be better.

So here’s my attempt at finding a solution and being accountable to you, the reader.  I’m not perfect, by any means.  But, I do want to be a better person.  So I’ve come up with a list of 5 ways to decompress.  I’m going to look back at this list….quite often….and do the things I’ve set out to do when I’m in a stressful situation.

You are welcome to use the list for yourself, share with someone, or even come up with our own list and share it in the comments below!  It takes support from others to help you get to where you want to go!

1. Go for a walk.

This is probably my most preferred way to decompress. It’s like hitting two birds with one stone. You get the exercise and it’s a time out. If you have a baby, strap them in the stroller and go for a brisk walk. Just a quick disclaimer: If you have little kids, make sure someone is at home to watch them while you take a walk. Safety is always first.

2. Breathe. 

It seems so simple, but breathing actually slows down your heart rate and it helps you relax.  Here’s a really cool app I found that helps! 

3. Take a time out.

We put our kids in time out to cool down. Well, adults can use a time out too! While you may not be able to take an hour time out (that would be nice), you can at least take a 10 minute time out to gather your thoughts, breathe, and cool down.

4. Take a hug break.

After calming down, I go to my kids and give them a hug. Sometimes, they come to me and give me a hug which is so sweet and humbling, especially after I was mean to them. Believe it or not, it has been proven that hugs reduce stress, illness, and blood pressure!  Read this article to find out more benefits of hugging.

5. Break out the massage!

I purposefully saved the best for last. Nothing relieves stress like a nice massage, right? For me, a neck and shoulder massage is where I find relief because that’s where I hold most of my stress. Here’s my favorite shoulder massager! You can find it here.  Let all that stress melt away with a nice massage!

I’ve heard the saying that when you’re relaxed, the whole family is relaxed.  On the flip side, if you’re stressed, everyone else is stressed.  The moral of this story is to make time for yourself because you are important.

Tell me how you deal with stress!  What’s your secret or your favorite way to relieve stress?  Tell me in the comment below.

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